You can’t disagree with the well-known statement that a breakup is a small death. The end of a relationship between a man and a woman is always accompanied by unpleasant sensations. It doesn’t matter how long people were together. The breakup leaves an imprint on the future life of both sides of this process.
But even in this situation, the emotional distribution is dosed unevenly. One side is much more difficult to survive a breakup compared to the other. Changes of the former way of life and fear of the unknown lead a person to a state of despair. The consequences of such stress are sad. So, what are the best ways to get over a breakup?
Ways to Get over Breakup
A breakup with a loved one is always stressful. Memories of past relationships often don’t allow us to move on, start new relationships and just enjoy life. Nevertheless, many psychological tricks will allow you to get out of the crisis after breaking up with a loved one. Take note of a few tips.
1. Put an end
Many couples nowadays are trying to maintain friendly communication after a breakup. But if a breakup occurred, first of all, you need to take the fact of what happened as a given. If a person has left, you must let him/her go. It is necessary to put an end to those relationships that you had. Stories are different. Unfortunately, breakups also occur in marital relationships. Therefore, when we say that it is necessary to put an end to it, we don’t mean that you have to close the door. No! Reconciling with a breakup means letting go of a person, forgetting, and erasing him or her from your memory. Accept such a decision, even if it seems mistaken. Stop holding your ex-partner. Even if you want to meet a girl now, you shouldn’t do this as soon as you broke up. It will not help either.
2. Give yourself time to be sad
You can’t hide emotions and try to survive the pain inside. Focusing on a problem will only aggravate it. New thoughts and contrived fears will appear. Initially, you shouldn’t hide aggression and tears. Your partner or you have already made your choice. You can’t do anything about it now. Don’t waste time on this, again and again undergoing mental pain. Just remember that this “disease” is cured and only a memory remains after full rehabilitation. This period should last no more than a week, otherwise, you may face a dangerous transformation to depression. As an option, you can visit a single ladies site just to relax and distract from bad thoughts.
3. Say goodbye and let go
It is very difficult for many people to deal with a breakup and their feelings. At first, you can be sure that you no longer want to see your ex-partner and it’s all over. But the pain subsides over time and love still doesn’t pass. And there is a desire to return everything to its place. And here it is important to have your pride! If the reason for the breakup was very serious and there was no way to return to a past relationship, then don’t knock on the closed door. Don’t chase a person and don’t avenge insults. Accept the breakup as if it is the beginning of a new, better stage in your life. This is one of the good ways to get over a breakup.
4. Recognize that he/she is not perfect
In the period of breaking up with a loved one, it seems that he/she was the only most beautiful and intelligent person on earth. Stop! The mere fact that he/she broke your heart suggested that he or she is just not your person and certainly not the greatest love of your life. Be honest with yourself: how often did you get angry because of his or her stubbornness, ignorance, attacks, and stinging remarks? The answer is obvious. Beware of idealizing your ex’s image. Take into account negative aspects too! Make a list of what you didn’t like about the person. This will help you look at the situation more objectively, and the pain of a breakup will begin to slowly pass.
5. Give yourself a break
You have just broken up, and now there is another fan? Wait to rush into the pool of new passions with your head. It is not the best solution to fight fire with fire. You need to be alone for some time, build up strength, and realize what mistakes you have made recently and how to fix them. It may be necessary to think about new requirements for a potential partner. And if some person insistently requires you to make a decision, don’t pay attention to him or her at all – impatient people rarely become good partners. Instead of starting another romance, perhaps it is better to visit a psychologist and figure out what mistakes you made in the relationship and how you can avoid them the next time.
6. Try not to succumb to destructive emotions
Life consists of black and white streaks. You must always remember this. No one is immune from such blows of fate as a breakup with a loved one. Try your best not to fall into negative emotions – resentment, anger, sadness, hatred, and even depression is possible in extreme cases. Don’t produce destructive thoughts in your head. This is one of the best ways to get over a breakup. If you start thinking about your sorrow, try to distract by something more positive. Did you break up? It is okay! This is not the end of life. The main thing is to be able to overcome this situation. And for this, you just don’t need to keep thinking negatively but try to let these thoughts go.
7. Find the pros in your free life
You have time for yourself. If you don’t find a good way to manage this situation, there is a risk of constantly nostalgic about the past and become depressed. Remember what you always wanted to do and what you may have been hindered by a lack of time and effort. You can find a new hobby, meet friends more often, and develop professionally. Creativity is one of the great activities that will allow you to express yourself, pour out negative energy, and receive positive emotions. Sports can also help: spending time in the gym, you will become even more beautiful, and during active movements, the body produces a hormone of joy – endorphin.
8. Learn to be alone
Do you know what the best ways to get over a breakup for men are? One of them is learning to accept loneliness. Yes, it can be difficult, but you need to learn this. A similar problem often arises in people who have been in a relationship for a long time and lived together. It can be very unusual for you to spend evenings in an empty apartment, have fun, do household chores or travel without your partner. Nevertheless, it is very important to find inner harmony and feel like a self-sufficient unit. Enjoy your freedom: a good book before bedtime, a walk in the park alone, home repair, and so on. Only when you enjoy freedom, you can build new harmonious relationships.
9. Make a list of good things
Don’t think that the black streak will last forever, the brain just responds to stress in this way. The world didn’t dim from your breakup. Try to write all the good that you have on a piece of paper. It can be friends, work, books, hobbies, your collection of magnets from different countries and your favorite cups, the taste of hot coffee on a rainy day or shopping. Try to fill up the list with new items every day and when you feel really bad, just re-read it. After a while, you will realize that there are many more interesting things on earth than shedding tears.
10. Talk with friends more often
It is very important to get support from friends in difficult times. But don’t forget to be interested in their affairs and ask about feelings, otherwise, the whole conversation will be built only on your problems and complaints about your former partner. Try to avoid communication with those people who will only aggravate your emotional state, emphasizing your guilt in everything that happened. Find those people who bring you relief and positive emotions and be sure to use this resource. Don’t forget to support friends and listen to their problems too. Discussing your problems, you will understand that you are not the one who has troubles, which means that you are not alone. Hope previous ten ways to get over a breakup have already convinced you in this.
11. Keep a diary
We want to repeat one of the best ways to get over a breakup once again – don’t share your pain with friends who may aggravate the situation. They will begin to feel sorry for you and speak negatively about your ex-partner, burning anger, and resentment in you. You can gossip with trusted friends and relatives. Don’t forget that tears are a normal reaction. But as an option, you can take out your grief and entrust all the pain to the pages of the diary, but don’t engage in arousing a negative reaction to your boyfriend or girlfriend. Write down what bothers you and don’t leave it in your heart and soul.
12. Take a little trip
A change of scenery will be a great way to escape from experiences and memories. Even if you spend the weekend in a new city, new emotions and impressions will do the trick. Distraction from sad thoughts quickly allows you to cope with a breakup. In addition, you can meet new people, learn something interesting, admire the monuments, and visit museums or entertainment centers. So, what are ways to get over a breakup? Don’t make your pain the center of a personal universe. If you don’t have the opportunity to escape, then take a long walk in the forest or along the unknown streets of your city on weekends. You can also visit excursions and learn many new facts about the place in which you live.
13. Change the environment that surrounds you
Get organized in your home. Do the cleaning to renew the energy of the room. Believe me, physical work is a great way to deal with anger and despondency. Wallpaper your walls or ask for help in moving furniture. The new interior will refresh not only your apartment but also your thoughts. Perhaps you already planned something similar but didn’t find free time. Now you have something to do, so don’t miss the opportunity. Throw away excess clothing or give to those who need it without regret. The order around will restore your mind and teach you how to cope with difficulties.
14. Engage yourself in watching good movies and reading interesting literature
Get inspired by the life of heroes who didn’t give up in crises, were able to overcome weaknesses in themselves and moved through life, finding positive moments. Such films will be, “Eat, Pray, Love” where people are going through a divorce process, and Julia Roberts finds herself traveling around the world. The film “Under the Tuscan Sun” will inspire you to a new life, and “Bridget Jones’s Diary” will help you think about your life and change your worldview. Don’t disregard good literature. Pages of books will take you to the world of emotions and fantasies. They will help cope with sadness and sad thoughts will be pushed back. These books may be “P.S. I love you,” “Gone with the Wind,” and many others will make you forget about a breakup.
15. Get adrenaline
Considering these 15 ways to get over a breakup, you had to understand that there is no place for negative emotions. You need to get adrenaline. Extreme sports or hiking are perfect for this. For example, men rarely share problems of their love relationships with friends and relatives. They tend to keep everything in themselves and experience troubles deep inside. Having a relationship, most men tend to compromise. That is, they choose in favor of what a loved woman wants. Therefore, if you have accumulated a mass of unrealized goals and plans, then it is time to act. If you dreamed of trying something extreme, then do it. It will definitely help.
16. Don’t force yourself to think differently
So, how to get over a breakup in healthy ways? After a break, many thoughts may arise in your mind, and it will take you some time to think them over. Don’t try to suppress them, wandering in your head about a previous relationship. Such thoughts are a completely natural process because everyone needs a certain amount of time to recover. Don’t force yourself to think differently and don’t try to get thoughts out of your head. Your feelings will fade over time, and this is a fact. Just try to cope with them. It will take from 1 month to 4 months. But you will not notice how fast this time will pass.
17. Revise your plans and goals
When there are two of you, you make joint plans, choose common guidelines and make many compromises. Now, it is time to revise your life. Have you long dreamed of visiting Norway but postponed this idea because your lover didn’t like any other vacation than lying on the beach? Or didn’t you dare to change your profession because your woman/man convinced you that management was your calling? When you decide to go beyond the usual framework, you will be surprised to understand that a breakup brings not only bitterness but also freedom, and only you can decide how to dispose of it.
18. Get a professional help
If it’s really hard to overcome this situation, then you need to go to professionals. There is nothing shameful in contacting a psychologist or psychotherapist. If you can’t do this, then specialized forums of psychologists or forums on the Internet will help survive the breakup. Of course, these people are strangers, but no one will even recognize you and will never see you. This option should be good for everyone. But of course, it is better to seek professional help. Services of psychologists are used by millions of people on earth, so they know how to help in this situation.
19. Get a pet
Get a shaggy and fluffy pet. This is one of the fast ways to get over a breakup. It’s always nice to return not to an empty apartment. Anyway, it has been proven that people who have such a friend at home live longer and happier than those who don’t. A pet will not only help you survive the breakup but will probably stay with you for a long time. It is even better if you take it from the shelter. You will be happy, and even save the pet from an unhappy life. Even this fact can cheer you up. Moreover, if you take a puppy or kitten, you will have so many responsibilities that you will not even have time to think about something else, especially about the person with whom you no longer have anything to do.
We have provided you with some simple ways to get over a breakup fast. Of course, all the negative consequences of the breakup will have to be survived. But if you learn to truly love yourself, then no breakups will scary you, and you will stop looking in other people for something that is lacking in yourself. It will be easy for you to give. And then, on the contrary, those around you will reach for you.